Friday, April 19, 2013

Another Goodbye

Today we had to say goodbye to my Tundra dog.

He had been limping for a while. I knew he'd been in some pain from his arthritis, but I wasn't ready to say goodbye. It's been a rough day.

Tundra was a good dog. We got Tundra and his adopted sister Sydney on the same day, in February of 2003. Adorable puppies - they were our kids before we had kids. I always wanted a Siberian Husky that I could go running with & Tundra was my dog. With his black & white fur and his ice blue eyes, he was just a handsome guy. All the kids would say "look - it's the dog from Snow Dogs!" He looked a bit fierce with his mask in the beginning, but he always had a big heart. Big paws and a big heart. He had SO much energy as a puppy. I remember thinking I couldn't wait till he got a little older and calmed down a bit. And then he did. And it was sad.

We lived in Park City when Tundra was a puppy and it was his PARADISE. The snow would be three feet high & he would just leap through it like a deer. His sister Sydney would have to try and keep up in his trail. He would roll around in the snow & if Jason threw a snowball, he would run, jump & DIVE down into the snow to find it.

Once we had kids, he became their beloved playmate. He was usually the favorite for the kids because he was big & lovable & he never jumped up on them. Our favorite times with our dogs were going camping and we could let them run free. Tundra would run & run & run. He wasn't always the best at coming when he was called, but somehow he always found his way back to us. In 2008, we went camping by Fishlake and he came back with porcupine needles in his nose, mouth & eyes. Poor guy. Always curious. Always so full of life. In 2009, he got hit by a car & we also found out he had some thyroid issues that same year. He was never quite the same, but still had plenty of life & energy to spare.
When we moved here to Cedar, we lived in a single level twin home for the first year. It was even more fun for the girls. They would bring the dogs in all the time and play with them. Dress them up. Tundra was good to let them have their way with him. There was a path by our home & we would often take them for walks. The girls would fight over who got to hold Tundra's leash. They also tried to teach him to say "I love you" like the youtube video dog.  He was McKinley's special companion when she was feeling down. She was really upset about something one day and stomped around & cried & then I didn't hear from her in a while & I looked outside. There she was with Tundra. She was talking to him. He was licking her face repeatedly. She came back in happy.  He loved to lick faces - especially Jason's scruffy face.  A few more camping trips. More cuddling. More time with my big boy...

And then today at 5am he started whining. He sometimes whines & then stops, but no matter how many times we checked on him and offered food & water, he just wouldn't stop whining. He wouldn't even eat a hot dog. When we got him to the vet, he said that his stomach had turned and he was in bad shape. He talked about surgery, but wasn't sure it would be very successful at his age & condition. In the end, we decided that he had suffered long enough & it was time to say goodbye. Oh - how I cried when I hugged & kissed my big boy! He has been a part of this family for so long. It's so hard to say good-bye to both my boys in a matter of weeks.  We are really going to miss him. When we would take the dogs to the park in Park City, we would have them wait at the top of the hill after we had unleashed them & then we would say "GO PLAY!" and they would take off running. As Tundra took his final breaths today, Jason said "Go play Tundra! Go play!" I believe he's now playing in heaven - free of pain - with my baby boy that didn't get the chance to play with him in this life.

We love you Tundra! Go PLAY!





10 comments:

Ryan and Shannan Hoffman said...

This just made me cry... I am so sorry. Too much loss for you guys. Prayers coming your way.

Lena Baron said...

I am so so so sorry!!

Tiff Meister said...

He was such a beautiful and sweet companion. I am so sorry. Love you guys!

dengman said...

Oh Heidi...my heart is so full for you. Tears were streaming down my face and Gabe kept asking, "Whats wrong?"....I told him he just had to read it. Bless you and your family. I believe they are playing together in heaven...waiting and watching over you! Loves to you.

dengman said...

Oh Heidi...my heart is so full for you. Tears were streaming down my face and Gabe kept asking, "Whats wrong?"....I told him he just had to read it. Bless you and your family. I believe they are playing together in heaven...waiting and watching over you! Loves to you.

Anna said...

Too much loss. Too much sadness. I'm sorry. He was a beautiful dog.

Get Hooked said...

My dear sweet friend! I'm so sorry. Hugs!

Trish the Dish said...

I am so sorry Heidi. I didn't get the chance to talk to you about Tundra when we were on the phone. And I deleted my half written other comment on the previous post because I'd already said it to you over the phone. Tundra was such a BEAUTIFUL fun dog and I know how much you loved him. I'm so so sorry you have to go through all of these trials! My prayers and heart are with you always. I love you big sis!

Kirsten Nagel said...

Heidi- I'm not sure if u remember me, I was friends with Tiff growing up and I was her double in "The Miracle worker". I recently started following your blog through posts on Tiffs and your moms Facebook pages. I'm so, so sorry to learn of the loss you've been faced with. But I had to tell you,... Your strength and faith in the face of such heartbreaking experiences has truly inspired me. To look at my little boys every day and kneel down in gratitude for the gift of being their mother. I pray for you every day and although its been years since you and I have even spoken, I feel blessed to be able to learn and grow from your truly inspiring honesty and love. Thank you, thank you for that
Sending prayers, love, and humble thanks,

Kirsten Nagel

Lisa-Lou-Who said...

Yep, those two boys can keep each other company.